Anyone who has read more than one or two of these musings knows that isitjustme dresses a little to the left. Still, being a liberal entails more than just lampooning George W. Bush and extolling the virtues of Bill Maher. (no challenge there) To be a true liberal (small “L”) one must be tolerant of ideas that differ from your own. You are required to accept the concept that people with thoughts and beliefs so ridiculous as to be comical, are nevertheless, entitled to respect. (except Rush Limbaugh)
Conservatives have it easier. If your sentiments run toward the rigid, right-wing, neocons; no judgement is required . Something either agrees with your narrow view of the world or it’s wrong. Period. Either you whole-heartedly support the war in Iraq or you’re a traitor. Simple.
An article in today’s news, however, caused this writer to reevaluate his liberal credentials. It seems that the widows of two combat veterans are suing the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs because the government will not allow them to carve a Wiccan symbol on their husbands’ headstones. You just can’t make this stuff up.
Wiccans, as you may know, worship the Earth and are often referred to as white witches or pagans. The religion is a bit free-form but harmless. There thought to be over 134,000 Wiccans in America and, approximately 1,800 active servicemen who list Wiccan as their religion. That preference is noted on their dog tags. If one of them is wounded, I have no idea what sort of clergy is summoned, or what kind of incantation or spell is performed. (See, a true liberal would never make a remark like that.) Although I am not aware that any Wiccans are numbered among my friends, I'm sure that they are nice folks. They have as much right to have their religion recognized as anyone especially if they are expected to serve.
The Department of Veterans Affairs lists an astounding 38 different symbols that can be inscribed on headstones. For the complete list please consult http://www.cem.va.gov/cem/hm/hmemb.asp. Anyone out there who can name more than ten gets the isitjustme order of merit. Recognized symbols include:
Fifteen variations on the Christian cross (I defy you to draw more than six)
One symbol for Atheists (which is not a blank space)
A number of Asian groups who could certainly hold their North American Congress in a booth at Burger King.
And two symbols (Muslim and Christian Scientists) whose insignia cannot be displayed on the website for copyright reasons. I assume that the gravestones that display these emblems carry a circled “R” in the lower right corner. Disclaimer optional.
One sanctioned group is the Eckankars. The specifics on their beliefs are a little fuzzy but I do know that they were founded by Paul Twitchell of Paducah, KY in 1965. How this group managed to make the list and the Wiccans didn't is an issue that only the veterans affairs folks can answer. The University of Virginia has a great site on modern religions if you are considering a change.
As a card-carrying member of the ACLU, I am obliged to treat all beliefs with deference. Who am I to say that Catholicism is a bona fide religion and the Tenrikyo Church members are cultist nuts? Membership is a poor gauge. Just because your church mailing list would fit on a post-it note doesn’t mean that you lack credibility. Aren’t we all God’s/ Buddha's children?
However, if the family members of deceased veterans are given free reign on the choice of grave markers - where will it end? Agnostics will demand a question mark. Worshipers of the NBA will require a basketball (the old style, if you please). And speaking of Old Style, what of the beer affectionatos? You can see where all of this might lead. Diversity is one thing, but too much variety causes chaos. After all, in the immortal words of Frank Burns, “Individuality is fine as long as we all do it together”.
For the time being, thirty-eight choices would appear to be sufficient. If your particular brand of worship isn’t represented; stage a rally, call the media, contact Al Sharpton, (no wait....if you call the media, you won’t need to call Rev. Sharpton) and state your case to the microphones. As for me, I’ll be at the First Church of Al Franken seeking guidance on how to be a better liberal.
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