...or would Guttenberg have sold more Bibles if he put Moses' picture on the jacket?

Things I learned while you were watching Dancing With the Stars:

Seriously, I refuse to watch reality TV on religious grounds but I understand that, while a team of professional judges has repeatedly suggested Bristol Palin get a performing arts scholarship from The Ministry of Silly Walks, America keeps voting her back on the show. Isitjustme update....apparently Ms. Palin was unable to jump the last hurdle to victory. Must have been all the donuts. According to the rules of the show, if enough of the citizens of fly-over country call in and vote for you, the judges opinion is overturned. Sort of like when voters pick someone who looks nice and talks funny rather than someone with actual ability.


We can only presume that Bristol and her multiple left feet are benefiting from couch-potato America's desire to vote for any Palin for...anything. If Major League Baseball isn't careful, Todd Palin might be voted starting shortstop for the 2011 All-Star Game. Bristol should be grateful that there isn't an intelligence test. "Who was Fred Astaire?" or "What dance movies have you seen?" might kill her chances.





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And, proving once again that those monkeys and their typewriters may yet tap out Romeo and Juliet, Sarah Palin has another book with her name and face on the dust jacket. (To suggest she wrote the book would be like suggesting that the Chairman of Verizon wrote the Yellow Pages.) The space between the covers, like the space between Sarah's ears, is chock full of disjointed thoughts, useless homilies and non-sequiturs which mostly end in reflections on why Sarah and her wonderful family are so mercilessly persecuted by the media...except, of course, Fox. A thorough reading of "America By Heart Reflections on Family, Faith and Flag" (she forgot Mothers, Trains, Farms, and Dogs.) will tell the reader everything they need to know about the woman who wants to be President. Ms. Palin's book is a wonderful trip to the county fair: a few thrills and lots of stuff that might make America great but, all that cotton candy eventually makes you sick.

One feature of the book is a list of things that Sarah finds irritating; among them: talentless wannabes who appear on TV on shows like American Idol. WOW! Sarah Palin is irked by blatantly unqualified posers who present themselves as talented candidates for public approval. I guess FEDEX was late to Alaska with that last shipment of irony.

Still, the soon-to-be imagined Sarah Palin Library will have at least two books to go along with all those Facebook postings and Tweets. The Library, planned for the campus of The University of Phoenix on-line, should open in 2025. By then Sarah's son Track will have been hired as The Apprentice by Donald Trump on live TV.