People you should be thankful for:
Rudy Giuliani.
As Rudy "did I mention 9/11" Giuliani agonizes over which New York State election to lose, the rest of us can only be thankful that we will continue to have Rudy to kick around for a little longer. America's Mayor remains undeterred by the fact that no former New York City Mayor has ever risen to higher office. (Unless you count Boss Tweed's election to president of the Stamp Club at Sing Sing.) Rudy is debating a run for Governor against whomever the Democrats get to oust current Governor David Patterson. The Democrats are hoping that his poor eyesight will prevent his realizing he's not on the ballot. Giuliani is leaning away from the Governor's race because: 1) Losing to Anthony Cuomo would suck and 2) Being Governor of New York would suck even more.
Rudy's other option is a run for the Senate against appointed incumbent Kirsten Gillibrand. The ink is barely dry on her website and already she's in a contest against the Michelle Wie of New York politics (lots of press...one win). All of this is happening while Rudy's former top cop, Bernard Kerik is facing a truckload of jail time as a small time grafter with big time ambitions. Kerik is the gift that keeps on giving. Rudy endorsed Kerik for head of Homeland Security. Kerik repaid the favor by lying to the vetting officers in Washington. Bernie's new home is the Westchester Correctional Facility where, sadly for Rudy, he will not be able to vote.
Whichever way Rudy jumps we can look forward to an entertaining election cycle filled with references to how being mayor when terrorists struck is germaine to handling New York's money problems.
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Sarah Palin
We could clear cut the entire State of Alaska and still not create enough paper to meet the needs of the Sarah Palin Experience. Between the book (500,000 sold...none read) and the reaction to her book/preelection tour, no tree is safe. Democrats are at wits end. The woman is wearing a teflon corset! No amount of logic, fact checking or literary criticism has made the slightest dent in her polling numbers or her marketability. Why would it? All that sniping is coming from the Eastern Media Elite. They're all Obama people. Socialists. What do they know about "real Americans" like us?
Running as the anti-intellectual is not only popular it's easy-breezy. No need to study intelligence briefings or learn where Russia actually is on a map. That stuff's for Harvard wonks. Forget learning the names of the Scandinavian countries. Who am I, Amergo Vespucci? Sarah's strength is her cluelessness. Her appeal is to the reality show watching, WalMart shopping, "Real Americans". Most of them treat stupid like a family member. They feel that the country has been hijacked by Eastern Liberals and minorities. Rather than respect people with educations and a little wisdom, they're resentful.
Sarah Palin is the perfect "style over substance" candidate. It would be a mistake to write her off as a fad with good legs. Her fans are loyal and they will do what she tells them. Remember, our friends in California elected Arnold Schwarzenegger and they're suppose to be sophisticated. If you don't believe that alienated, disenfranchised voters can elect an anti-candate, ask Jesse "The Body" Ventura.
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Governor Mark Sanford
The man who gave the world the euphemism "hiking the Appalachian Trail" has been charged with 37 ethics violations by the South Carolina Senate Ethics Committee. (I was surprised as anyone to learn that, not only were their "ethics" in South Carolina but, they have a committee to investigate them.) Governor Hot Pants has offered in his defense the assertion that the violations were "technical". Voters of the Palmetto State were relieved to learn that flying repeatedly to South America to canoodle a TV journalist was a technicality. Of course Sanford was technically married at the time, technically lied to everyone about his wilderness activities and was technically not authorized to use state funds to enhance his sex life. We can only hope that a South Carolina judge will help The Gov. trade his soul mate for a cellmate. There he will be free to ponder the ramifications of following his johnson across state and international borders..at taxpayer expense.
Happy Thanksgiving!
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