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Really Joe!
You can call yourself an "independent" if it makes you feel better but at the end of the day you just like hearing the sound of your own voice. Even with an ego the size of yours, there are some things you don't do. You don't embarrass your party by shilling for the opposition. It's one thing to express support for some position or policy that is embraced by the other guy but that's a far cry from appearing at their convention. You look like some reformed drug addict who can't wait to testify that he "once was lost but now am found".
Everyone applauded your independent senatorial victory after the Democratic party in Connecticut found you chronically, insufficiently liberal. Hurt feelings is hardly an excuse for whoring yourself to the Republicans. Grow some class, Joe. The people of Connecticut (remember them?) didn't vote for some born-again conservative. They liked your style and they apparently have a longer memory than you have. They remember the Joe Lieberman who stood with Al Gore. Think you could get elected in Connecticut today?
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Amid the screaming and shouting about Sarah Palin and her soap opera family, has anyone considered the feelings of Bristol Palin's "fiancee"?. Poor Levi Johnston. As a former high school horndog, I can appreciate the boy's plight. One minute you're engaging in a little horizontal hip hop with the Governor's daughter; the next minute you're acting all serious at the Republican National Convention. Dude!!
Just wait until the press starts interviewing your buds. I'm sure that the bloggers will be sensitive. So, Bobby, did Levi tell all you guys that "abstinence only" was just a sort of guideline? Did he tell you where they did it?
It's unlikely that 60 Minutes will feel the need to pursue this story but The New York Post will feel no such restraint. (When Joe Lieberman learned that Bristol's guy was named Levi, he invited him over for a brisket.)
I can just see Karl Rove and Dick Cheney, shotgun at the ready, explaining to young Mr. Johnston what his marching orders will look like for the next few months. Levi probably wishes he had joined the National Guard with Bristol's brother. Then he could be making tracks with Track.
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So I hear that John McCain did some time in the Navy. Who knew?
Honest to God, if Fred "slow talking" Thompson spoke for five more minutes about John McCain's victories at sea, I was going to need a Dramamine. I thought we were trying to elect a President not the captain of the Minnow.
Question: How do you make a three day convention seem like four days?
Answer: Ask Fred Thompson and Norm Collman to speak.
The convention so far has more closely resembled a remake of 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. McCain is a war hero. We get it. He got shot down and spent several unpleasant years as the guest of North Vietnam. OK. Did anyone mention that he graduated from Annapolis ranked 894 in a class of 899?. Didn't you think that flight school was only for the best and the brightest? Wow! Good thing dad's an admiral.
Anyway, now that we are presumably finished listening to how McCain charged up San Juan Hill and stormed the beaches at Normandy, we will get an earful of how Sarah Palin wrapped bandages at Gettysburg and, with one wave of her sword, drove the abortionists from Alaska. Even Keith Olberman can't save this show.
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