Saturday, April 06, 2013

...or could white smoke at the Vatican be a warning that the house is on fire?

We have a Pope.

He's a white male over 75. He was elected by 117 Cardinals who were appointed by either John Paul II or Benedict XVI. His views on social issues are well documented. He is conservative enough to run for Congress in any one of six East Texas districts.  So, because the election took place around Passover, I am reminded of that famous Seder question "Why is this night different from all others"? Answer; it's not. Aside from the speed with which the Cardinals made a decision there's not much new here. (I am reliably informed that the decision was made urgently what with more than 100 old men forced to share a bathroom.)  And after all, Cardinal Bergoglio was runner-up to Benedict XVI in 2005 (It seems that Cardinal Bergoglio was leading, until the tricky talent competition when he dropped his crosier.)

Seriously, Francis I is as likely to bring the Church into this century as Rick Santorum is to marry his mailman. It's mystifying that the election of every pope (I've seen six so far) is followed by a wave of unwarranted expectation for change. Commentators and journalists busy themselves for hours reading the tea leaves for clues as to what steps the new Pontiff might take to improve Catholicism. "He took the bus to work and lived in a modest apartment in Buenos Aires"; "he's a Jesuit, he's never worked in Rome,  he has never had his mind warped by that viper's den that is the Roman Curia." Well, pardon my Latin but BFD!

The greatest irony in Catholicism was the sight of nuns weeping openly in Vatican Square when the new Vicar of Christ was announced. I can only guess they're crying over their continued pitiful treatment at the hands of the geezers in the red beanies; a plight that's likely to change around the same time that openly gay priests will be allowed to marry...each other.

Watching the Church deal with its shrinking flock and legal nightmares is like watching the Republicans attempting to fix their issues. The only difference between them is membership. The Church has 1.2 billion. The RNC has 34. (The same number that regularly attend Mass in France.) Before you can fix a problem, you have to admit you have one. The bishops and cardinals in Rome have convinced themselves that issues like child molestation are isolated incidents blown out of proportion by a hostile, secular press. Why does a religion that places such a premium on contrition have such trouble admitting its own sins?  When your best defense is that the percentage of priests who are child abusers is about the same as for the population as a whole, you don't need a new pope you need Dr. Phil.

The Catholic Church needs transparency. They don't have to change their policy on married priests (God forbid) but what would it hurt to have a public conversation? No one is expecting a synod of bishops to debate the virginity of Mary but why would it be a problem to have one regarding women priests? At the end of the day at least people would understand the Church's objections. When your answer to every controversy is "Because we say so" you drive Catholics away in droves. This isn't the twelfth century.  The good old days days of Tomas de Torcuemada and his creative methods of persuasion are over. The time of rewarding dissent with a trip to the Protestant barbecue pit are done. The Church needs more than threats and fear. They need to respond to a congregation that's educated, logical and less impressed by Roman collars than in generations past.

Francis is a Jesuit and the Jebs are educators with a deep respect for inquiring minds. Perhaps this Pope will treat the Catholics of the 21st century with the intellectual respect they deserve. Hey, it could happen.




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