...or did these stories slip past?

There are no slow news days, only slow bloggers.

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George Christian, executive director of the Library Connection, has denied the FBI access to library records in the Hartford, Conn. area. Well, hats off to George. Who would have guessed that one librarian in New England would have more balls that the entire 535 members of Congress (Nancy Pelosi notwithstanding).

The Patriot Act is the worst single piece of legislation since the Alien and Sedition Laws enacted under John Adams. The Bush administration used the attack on 9/11 to enact a draconian set of abridgments to American freedom and repeal is long overdue.

Mr. Christian was quoted as stating that freedom of speech is still alive and well in Connecticut. There is, however, still no talking in the library. Shhhhhhhhhhh!

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The Department of Defense has extended the tour of duty of soldiers serving in Iraq from twelve to fifteen months. If that doesn't sound like a big deal to you than you have never served in an overseas assignment in the military.

From the moment a soldier or Marine sets one boot down in-country, they start counting down the days until they arrive at what used to be called, the "big wake-up" to go home. Having only a few weeks before leaving was known as being "short" and it was the best feeling there was. To have your time in-country extended by three months is about as demoralizing as getting a "Dear John/Joan" letter (or maybe it's a "Dear John/Joan" e-mail now). Anyway it sucks big time and it's a lousy thing to do to the kids that volunteered for this disaster. Shame on Don Rumsfeld and George Bush for trying to fight this war on the cheap.

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The paternity of Anna Nicole Smith's estate has been narrowed down to one blond a-hole. It appears that Anna Nicole had more boobs in her life than the two double D's she was buried with. Call me old fashioned but should it really take the combined scientific resources of two continents to discover the identity of this child's father? Why not just advise all parties that there is absolutely no money involved then wait to see who doesn't head for the airport? He's the dad.

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Ted Haggard is still straight after more than two months. Praise God and pass the Appletinis. Witnesses say that, during a prayer meeting in Madill, Oklahoma, Rev. Haggard jumped to his feet and ceremoniously burned his Judy Garland cd's and reduced his pink golf shirts to ashes. Unfortunately, repeated prayers have failed to miraculously heal the earring hole in his right ear. We're pulling for you Rev.

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Because of the equal time rule in political campaigns, the producers of Law & Order might be required to shelve any episode featuring possible presidential candidate Fred Thompson as NY District Attorney Arthur Branch.
In a related story, the presidential candidacy of Rep. Dennis Kucinich is causing the Cartoon Network to consider suspending future episodes of Sponge Bob Squarepants.

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For you Fordham fans out there, attend the tale of Daniel Gross, third year law student at FU School of Law and a latter day Norma Rae. Gross is a former barista, that's a guy who earns beans for cooking up cups of coffee at Starbucks that cost more than the GNP of Brazil. (I thought that a barista was a South American lawyer.)
Anyway Daniel is trying to organize the employees of Starbucks to join the Starbucks Workers Union, an affiliate of the IWW. (Who knew they were still around?). This idea is about as popular with Starbucks as ten cent latte. In a Stepford-like response to inquiries, Starbucks claims to "respect" the right of "partners" (Starbucks-speak for employees) to organize. Of course they do. They also respect the rights of employees to get their union-joining asses over to Carabou and apply for a job there.

Companies like Starbucks can't exist without an army of part time, semi-skilled workers who get few benefits and have no rights. Unlike Circuit City, a company that unconscionably fired many of it's higher paid employees because they were highly paid (compared to a homeless person), Starbucks can't claim that competition is forcing them to cut costs. They make more on a cup of pretentious, cold coffee than a movie theater does on a large popcorn.

So man the barricades. Let's all line up behind Daniel Gross and his band of pseudo-socialists. Stand up America! You have nothing to lose but your decaf, double shot dulce de leche latte. No foam please.